I avoid answering the question “How old are you” and here’s why I started avoiding the age question as soon as I crossed 40!
- Because with “age”, it got harder and harder to find a partner who sees my fine lines and wrinkles as a badge of honor rather than of horror.
- Because I get the jaw-drop and the eyes wide open kind of reaction when I reveal my real age..
- Because I was told “You’re old” in a derogatory way, few times..
- Because I am considered “outdated” in the job market..
- Because I am not cool enough in the eyes of the Millennials..
- Because even the nicest and sometimes most educated people I meet, tend to put me in the “obsolete” category when I tell them my real age..
I live in a country where aging is a taboo, where being of a certain age equates to approaching your “expiry date”.
I live in a society where a hiring manager asks in his/her application for your age before moving further in the interview process..
I live in an environment where women are not supposed to allow their fine lines to develop into wrinkles for fear of being looked down at and excluded from certain social circles.
I live in a society where being in your 40's means your chances of being considered for a serious relationship are slim because you’re deemed as desperate..
So I decided to challenge the status quo and I am now using a number that does not define the length of time since I’ve existed on earth.. when asked about my age, I say that I have ‘X’ number of “Years in living” or YIL, and by ‘YIL’ I am referring to a metric system that I invented, where a weighted average is calculated to gauge the following:
- The environment that I grew up in: I endured war, oppression, hunger, etc.. so my score is really high on this scale..
- Level of Emotional intelligence and maturity: My score gets higher day by day..
- Level of responsibility towards my parents: Really high score
- Level of success with my life partners: Poor score, really poor
- Level of independence: Highest score!
- Personal achievements (Not including professional ones): Medium to high score!
- Number of books I read: High to very high score!
Although I have an MBA, I decided to exclude the level of education from ‘YIL’ because an academic education does not equate nor match the level of general education you get from life…
So, these are my metrics and I would invite everyone to come up with their own and reject the old way of being measured, valued, assessed in this shallow materialistic world because a number next to your “age” does not define how wonderful of a human being you are!
This piece is dedicated to my closest friend, sister and soulmate R. and to my source of inspiration A.
